TumblrTheThird

Sorry it took a couple of days to send my regards. I’ve been staring at the ceiling for the last 48 hours with what I assume was the flu. (Happy Birthday, Mims. All the worst. Sincerely, Mother Nature.) I just wandered out to my computer to do a couple of things.

1) Thank all of you guys. (Mission accomplished.)

2) Begin writing a treatise for my company on why Darwin kicks Bill Smith’s ass.

The latter is a product of two days of feverish internal dialogue on corporate efficiency and productivity. For those of you who don’t know Bill Smith, he’s the Motorola engineer who put a pox on American business management called Six Sigma. This billion-dollar industry created the grey-pinstriped equivalent of the Sturmabteilung, allowing thousands of slick, aggressive hacks to quit their corporate gigs, open consulting firms, and tour America’s office parks like the Grateful Dead in Audi A4s.

These Jos Bank jackoffs charge thousands of dollars to companies to have their management teams go to meeting after meeting after meeting after occasional seminar on efficiency and productivity. Because meetings and seminars are the ultimate solution to inefficient and unproductive workplaces.

Orwell couldn’t have come up with this shit.

Anyway, I came out to sharpen the tongue through the laptop keys when I decided to do a background check on Mr. Smith. The last line of his Wikipedia page pretty much says it all: “Smith died of a heart attack at work in 1993.”

That’s when I decided to leave Bill alone for the night, put this little work tirade away, go back to bed and contemplate a matter of slightly more importance: You die in the end. Don’t forget to rage against the dying of the light while bitching about its dimming.

Nothing like a birthday to help you remember that.

Thanks again for the well wishes.

posted 1 month ago

TumblrTheThirdJust a hobo. In a tutu. Tumblng.

Thank You, You Sick Bastards. Also: Fuck Bill Smith.