I’ve followed Fucking Homepage for a while. I like everything about it. The attitude. The consistency. The actually useful links. The daily photo. The only problem: it’s set to hit my dashboard at 2:00 AM. I scan it when I wake up in the three minutes after my last snooze and before I haul ass to the shower because I spent ten extra minutes in bed. That means I rarely get to investigate and explore all of its links and content as much as I’d like. But there’s one section that’s linkless, that I always see, and that usually frames my morning in a different way than I would if I hadn’t read it (because I fucking hate mornings). It’s the Tip of the Fucking Day.
I’m currently in a long run of bad days. Not awful. Not deathly. Just bad. The kind of bad you have when there’s (yet another) impending court date over parenting time and custody. Lingering bad. Wake-up-and-prepare-for-the-bad bad. Anyway, today’s tip instantly improved things for whatever reason, so I went back over the last 50 days to check out those tips, too. If you like them, dig through the archives on the homepage. There are more than 850 available. That’s 850 bad days made slightly fucking better.
Tips on Relationships
Compliment people randomly but genuinely.
Be someone who others look forward to seeing tomorrow.
Be comfortable with yourself and others will be comfortable with you.
Anger is never the answer. Logic always wins.
People who try to bring you down are already below you.
There is never a good reason to be mean. If they deserve it, you’re better off walking away.
When a good person does something bad, they own up to it.
No one can make you angry or upset without your consent.
Don’t reject new relationships because old ones didn’t work.
Don’t lie to anyone you care about.
Always try to see things from the other person’s perspective.
People like polite people.
Tips on Health
Take care of your body. It’s the only one you have.
If you don’t take care of yourself, no one else will.
What you eat will affect how you feel.
The easiest way to eat well is to cook your own food with real ingredients.
If you want to change unhealthy habits, do it gradually. Don’t overwhelm yourself.
Exercise and investing are hobbies that will pay off in the long run.
Tips on Opportunity
Nobody will just give you what you want. You have to get up and go get it yourself.
Just saying hello can lead to a million things.
Effort is the most important attribute.
There is never a perfect time for anything. If you want something and have the means, do it.
You will never regret getting things done ahead of schedule.
Don’t find excuses to ignore opportunity.
Never do tomorrow what you were supposed to do yesterday.
Tips for Better Awareness
A mistake made once is just a lesson.
Be frugal, but don’t be a cheapskate.
You will never be really good at something unless you practice a lot.
Those ten extra minutes in bed never make you less tired. They just make you late.
Your environment shapes you. If you want to change, put yourself in a new situation.
Avoid “zero” days. Do at least one thing productive every day.
A green light doesn’t mean it is safe to go. It just means it’s legal.
Asking for help is not a sign of weakness.
Always walk as if you have somewhere you have to be.
Don’t pretend to be knowledgeable of things you know nothing about.
Always ask before you touch someone’s pet.
"Are you mad?"
“I’m not mad at all, sweetie.”
“I’m sorry I threw up.”
“Don’t worry. We’ll get you to bed and get you all better.”
“I’m sorry, Daddy.”
[Cubs tickets for tonight’s game in his hand.] “Nothing to worry about at all.”
I miss you!
Thank you. I miss me, too. Let me know if you ever find me, so that I can stop gluing my face to the side of milk cartons.
I reckon what I’m talking about is…the middle part of life. A large part is a grinding affair—working away, having a family, making the whole thing happen. And at the end of it, most people are pretty worn out. They don’t believe in God. They don’t believe in anything beyond this ephemeral existence that we’re in now. Their attitudes are cynical. They’re what we in America call ‘assholes.’ And I was one of them…
…It occurred to me one time when I was driving to work—and I had a lot of reports to dictate that day—that I was still shoveling shit, which had been the way I started my life on the dairy farm. When I looked back on it, I thought: ‘This is the most absurd, stupid way to go through a life that a person could ever dream up.’ But we’re all being pushed on to do this.
And then I had the opportunity to stop.
…Why don’t I just cash it in and start a whole new life? Like, be another person. Reinvent myself. I don’t have to be a doctor to the last minute and keel off into the oblivion that way.