“I just want to do God’s will. And He’s allowed me to go up to the mountain. And I’ve looked over. And I’ve seen anorexic white girls selling heart-shaped polka-dotted blouses in the colors of the Denver Broncos and tassled merlot flats. I may not get to use the promo code GAPDEAL at checkout with you. But I want you to know tonight, that we, as a people, will get to the Promised Land of discounted skinny jeans and denim jackets. So I’m happy, tonight. I’m not worried about anything. I’m not fearing any man. Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Medgar Evers 40% Off In-Store Only Daylong Sales Event.” — Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.